The Opposition of Being True to Self

Joyce Meyer once said, ” If you don’t like yourself then you’re in for a miserable life because everywhere you go, you are there!”

double headbands! Classic

When I was younger I struggled with who I was, A LOT.


I would say that the majority of those feelings stemmed from being so misunderstood by others, including people I loved and cared about. It actually served as motivation to start blogging and I lightly touched on it in my first post. It plays a huge role in my willingness to be transparent and vulnerable. I don’t want other people who may feel as I once did to go through life stuck in that place. A place of feeling like they have to conform for the approval of those around them.

Besides the fact that my personality is one of peculiar taste, my style tends to be even louder. This only added to the misperception commonly held by others who came into contact with me. I”m willing to admit I’ve rocked some pretty un-traditional styles, before they were even “on trend”,  if ever! I’ll share some photos within this post if I can find any!

2014-02-18 12.50.59

I caught a lot of pushback for my choice in attire, alone.

In high school, I used piercings more than anything to ” express” myself. And when my parents inquired I would always say, ” I just like it. I can always take it out.” That was true but as I got older I figured out some actions were my attempt at “defying” stereotypes and the connotations associated with some of the ways I choose to express myself. I was upset about people ” judging a book by its cover,” so to speak. And for a long time I honestly didn’t care about what other people thought, but when it started to weigh on my parents I began to get uncomfortable.


” I don’t do things for the response or controversy. I just live my life. If you dont live your life, then who will?” – Rihanna 

As I got older, my style only intensified with more piercings, daring hairstyles, and loud clothing. often, I felt like I would battle myself between being who I am and who I felt like the people I cared about wanted me to be and look like…

2013-06-08 15.14.54_preview

The truth of the matter, I have never been a cookie cutter kid. If asked, I would define myself as a nonconformist, free spirit that continues to evolve. I’ve never really been like “normal” kids but as life has gone on I’ve gained a greater appreciation for that. I hate to know, as I’ve experienced it first hand, that being who you are isn’t as encouraged as it should be. There are so many things I could share, as my mind overflows with thoughts and feeling regarding this topic. I think it’s most important to be vocal with those who matter and disregard the opinion of people that don’t. It’s also important to remember that despite your choice of appearance in expressing yourself what matters most is the content of your character.



As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become quite outspoken, honest and secure in my spontaneous attempts of wardrobe ensembles and expression. I, also, realize that there is a time and place for most things, as well. You can only allow people to put you in a box when you allow them to change who you are. Today, I do feel I’m still misunderstood, but because people want to put me in a box and ya girl ain’t going for it. People don’t like what they can’t understand but that’s also not your problem. There’s an opportunity to learn, but no one can be forced. Like Kanye says, ” Everybody’s going to say something, I’d be worried if they said nothing!” * Kanye Shrug*


When you try to incorporate characteristics outside of who you are, you begin to lose yourself. I’ve been there, done that, and never want to go back. When you begin to know who you are in Christ, you will be able to recognize your value and find security in all the things you never understood about yourself.  I’ve come to realize that God created me unique and there must be something in me that He wants the world to see. If I’m able to help impact the life of another by righteously being me, that’s a challenge I’m willing to accept.

Things to remember & consider:

  • God saves your soul but sanctifies your personality. We all have areas that could use improvement or call for change. Bare with yourself as you continue to gain wisdom and insight that promotes growth.
  • God already knows who we are! There’s nothing you can do to ” surprise” HIM
  • I am validated because Christ died for my sins. All of our sins. Honestly, only God can judge our sins. I’m not saying I’ve always made perfect choices but It’s what we take away from our mistakes that help shape who we are/become. Forgive yourself.
  • Be comfortable in being who you are, even when it’s uncomfortable by resting your spirit in Christ



Comment down below any thoughts, feelings or concerns!




Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end. (NLT) ( Ecclesiastes 3:11 )

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well. Psalm 139:14

Above all else, guard your heart,
    for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus Romans 8:1

Do not be far from me,
    for trouble is near
    and there is no one to help. Psalms 22:11

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28


5 thoughts on “The Opposition of Being True to Self

  1. “Never never never judge a book by it’s cover!!” is the theme I perceive from this piece. No matter what Love Burn looks like she is a daughter of the King and His perfect creation, as am I and as are you (when you are baptized into His body.) Ayla, you came with it with the scripture! You used one of my FAVES, Ecc. 3:11 💕💕💕💕💋 If Jesus be lifted up, He will draw all men!! Amen.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s